I was creeping on a classmate on tumblr. She was my role model for a good amount of high school. I admired her and resented her at the same time because I was so jealous of her. But when I talked to her, I couldn’t help liking her. She had that kind of nature. She was so genuine; when you leaned in to talk to her, she leaned forward too, expression focused and with suppressed excitement, genuinely curious about what you were going to say. It caught me so off guard; most people aren’t like that. They maintain eye contact half-heartedly and sometimes, they don’t even look at you when they talk to you, as if you’re not worth a few minutes of conversation (which peeves me to no end). Genuine in everything she did. 

I want to be like her. I’m tired of half-assing things and telling a million white lies a day. How would people ever get to know the real me?